Can I have a bar of soap?

[twasadark]

I've been reduced to trolling the Pit (ff.net) for Dark Angel fics. 

It is a scary, scary place, my friends.  But I have girded my loins and waded into battle.

Who the hell ever thought up SONGFIC??? It's completely and utterly WRETCHED!!!  Also, my favorite of the many atrocities I have encountered at the Pit:

Dear 14 year old girl who has apparently just written your first fanfic ever:  There is no such term as atom's apple.  It's Adam's apple.  Please to be investing in a dictionary.  Then peruse it upon occasion.  K?

Also, I feel dirty because for some reason everyone over at spnstoryfinders was looking for Sam and angels ficcies tonight so of course I pimped the HELL out of my fics Day of the Dead and The Watchman, which were both written before Season 4.  I am, of course, hoping for some gushing reviews about how wonderful they are.  Because it's been the kind of day in which I just might have thrown myself in front of a mac truck, if for some reason one had been barreling down my quiet suburban street. 

I'm better now.  Really.  I only twitch and spontaneously scream out "atom's apple" every two hours or so instead of every fifteen minutes.

Comments

[minniemax.livejournal.com]

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, The Pit is scarier than Lucifer himself...

When it comes to languages, I am really a snob. I'll never buy the poor excuse of "beginners" and "writing and getting concrit is good for learning" etc.
The only concrit I have for people who don't even know how to spell and also don't bother to use a spellchecker or dictionary is "Please cease and desist. You can come back when you reached the high school level."

What scares me even more are the gushing reviews all the poorly written pieces get...

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Awww, your kitty icon BLINKS. How cool is that?? :-)

The sad thing about the "atom's apple" fic is that it was passingly well written at the start. A good percentage of the "stories" over at the Pit have egregious spelling/punctuation errors starting with the first line. Truly horrifying.

I think we should console ourselves with a game of Scrabble!! I'll set one up! :-)

ps - whoops!! I went over to lexulous and found that we already had a game set up and it was MY turn. *hangs head in shame* for being so late....

[minniemax.livejournal.com]

YAY!!

[minniemax.livejournal.com]

heh, no problem

I think it's one of the old ones - when they put scrabulous down, we haven't finished it yet and they transferred it after a while

[thejazzter.livejournal.com]

atom's apple? You bet I laughed. LOUDLY.
I wonder what kind of grammar they teach kids in school these days. o.O

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

INORITE? Pretty scary!!

[bloodnfire.livejournal.com]

Oh god, songfic. *shudders*
Heh, say what you like about ff.net but at least it brings the lolz.

Mmm Dark Angel fic, I want to read Dark Angel fic so I can ignore the ones I'm trying to write.

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

For sure! The lolz amidst the horrors. :-)

Love your Alec/Logan icon! Does this mean you're writing a little DA slashy slash?? Cause that would be delicious!!

[downfall35.livejournal.com]

I must admit I have let my writing of DA Alec/Logan fics slide recently but that's not my fault, blame Castiel/Dean. Must write more ships50.

'Atom's apple' lmao gold!

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Well, if you have to let your Alec/Logan stuff slide you are at least doing it for an awesome pairing! :-) Alec/Logan. Yum. I may have to try my hand at that myself ....

[xo-disaster-ox.livejournal.com]

Noooooooo... you must not troll the fic. After half an hour there you lost half your braincells. Believe me - I know. I spend an hour there xD

atom's apple? OUCH

*smishes*

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

HAHA!! I know, huh?

[joans23.livejournal.com]

atom's apple!
You are a very brave person indeed!!

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Normally I just skip over the atrocities I find there, but that one was just too priceless to ignore!

[tahirire.livejournal.com]

Troo fax. *facepalm*

What is a song!fic? Is it when you set a fic to lyrics? Because if it is, I might have done that once. *hides*

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I guess song!fic is a fic set to lyrics. But you can actually WRITE, so it doesn't count as wretched in your hands. :-) BTW, I've bookmarked yours to read when I get the chance. *smishes*

I think it was more of a trend a couple of years ago over at the Pit. I don't see it much anymore. Thank the Lord!

[tahirire.livejournal.com]

LOL, awwww, that's so sweet of you. I only did it because I really latched onto the song and that was before I learned how to vid. Now I have vids, so. ;-)

[moonshayde.livejournal.com]

That place is hilarious ;)

*sigh* I miss fanfic.

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Drabble drabble drabble drabble!

Not that I'm hinting anything.

:-)

[moonshayde.livejournal.com]

LOL I haven't forgotten you. I know you're like one of the last I owe.

I need to figure out Joshua's voice and I am all good to go. I haven't had time to double check on it. I have the idea all planned out.

Maybe you know. Does he sometimes refer to himself as Joshua this and Joshua that, or he is normal in his speech? Well, not normal. I know he has a certain way of speaking. It's just not cemented in my head.

The drabble I'm doing is hurt!Alec with Joshua so it's kind of important LOL

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

*flails around wildly at the idea of Hurt!Alec*

You know, while I can't think of a specific incidence where Joshua has referred to himself in the 3rd person, that seems like a totally in-character thing for him to do. So I think it would work, regardless of whether or not it's canon.

And I'm not just saying that as a result of my mad flailing. :-)

[zed-pm.livejournal.com]

LOL ATOM'S APPLE. That doesn't even make sense. XD

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Haha!! I know, right?

[thatgirlsix.livejournal.com]

*peeks around corner really quick to say ...*

If you must lower yourself to go to Hell for DA fics, there is only one author who still posts there who is worth the read: inzane73 (http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1102948/inzane73). She has the occasional grammatical slip up that's only noticeable to people who actually know what they are doing. "Gone" and "There Goes the World" are both fabulous.

Happy reading!

*eeps back behind the corner where it's safe*

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Hey, thanks! You're welcome to peek your head out any time! :-) I think I might have read some of her stuff over at NWP, but I'm not sure. That site is really a pain for me to access, because you have to jump all over the place. Anyhow, thanks for the recs for "Gone" and "There Goes the World." I'll put them on the to-be-read list.

[dysonrules.livejournal.com]

Oh NOES!!! Not trolling ff.net!!! HAHAHAHA! You'll be traumatized for life now. Good thing you don't have an Atom's Apple. *dies laughing*

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

I know! LOL!!!

[inanna-ishtar.livejournal.com]

lol@atoms apple!!

Ah, The Pit. I've been hanging out there a bit lately, trying to find decent Bones fic. I've waded through some stinkers, but also found some gems. The Pit is like a box of chocolates - left on the heater over night.

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

That's what keeps me going - the faint hope that I'll find something really good. :-)

[caz2y5.livejournal.com]

I got my Uni results today and apparantly i suck. but the thought of you twitching every two hours instead of every fifteen minutes is totaly made of win and i feel much better! thanks.

haha.

glad to hear that you are feeling better now too.

I was thinking of posting my work at fanfic but after reading this i might not!

[twasadark.livejournal.com]

Oh, you don't suck, hon! You RULE! Always remember that! It is just taking the people at Uni a little longer to see that than they should!

Despite the way I mock ff.net I do post my stuff there. I'm a total review hog. LOL